We’ve grown up with fairytales where the prince wins the princess’s heart with his charm, good looks and chivalry. We have dreamed about these princes since we were old enough to play dress up in our mother’s wedding gown. Yet, when faced with such a man in real life, we often look right past him. As the saying goes, nice guys finish last. But while bad boys will always have that certain something about them that makes them dangerously attractive, I think it’s time to pay attention to the real benefits of dating a good guy.
If you are constantly waiting to hear back from your man, secretly dreading to introduce him to your parents and friends, or sick of wasting time waiting to hear back from him and wondering whether he really likes you, you may need to find yourself a good guy. These good guys can be spotted by their polite behaviour, willingness to open doors for females and consistency in following through with an arranged date. These are the guys you don’t have to worry about anything with, the ones who don’t cause frustration or the need for group meetings with the girls to discuss ‘what’s going on’.
I know it can be exciting dating a bad boy and don’t get me wrong, the idea of a man who rides a bike and looks a bit rough around the edges is always sexy. I’m not talking about this. I’m not talking about a man who has a bit of a wild side (this, I think we can all agree, is actually a good thing). I mean those boys who think too highly of them self, expect girls to fall at their feet and treat them like something they can mess around with then cast off again when they’re bored.
They can often be hard to spot in the beginning because they’re also generally the boys who know all the right things to say. They are masters of talking the talk, without walking the walk. Of course, there’s a difference between calling you beautiful because they know you’ll eat it up to saying it because they mean it. There’s a difference between simply telling you they’re happy to wait “as long as you want” before sleeping together, to actually waiting and not rushing you on it – and then not rushing out the nearest door, window, or fire escape afterwards without so much as another word because they’ve finally reached their ‘goal’.
Somehow, I’ve been pretty lucky not to waste too much time on boys like this and instead find genuinely good guys to spend time with. And I believe these good guys are actually everywhere, you just have to keep your eye out for them and, most importantly, not overlook them.
I think the phrase “treat ‘em mean, keep ‘em keen” needs to be thrown out of some of our vocabularies and replaced with something along the lines of “if he treats you mean, tell him to f*ck off”. I know, I know, it’s not as catchy and doesn’t rhyme but it’s much better advice in the long run.
In my opinion, good guys should be the most attractive guy there is. Paying attention, remembering what you say, caring about what’s going on in your life, making future plans with you – these are all traits possessed by good guys. These are traits we should all look for and not settle for anything less. Our favourite fairytale characters certainly didn’t … and they all ended up living happily ever after.