I recently decided I need to take a step back from bread. I didn’t want a fully fledged break up, we just needed some time apart. It was my fault, I’d become too dependent, I was eating bread too often. Our relationship was starting to become unhealthy for me. Bread has been sneaking unnecessary carbs into my diet for years. Bread, you delicious, sly fox, you.
This decision alone shows just how much my attitude to health and fitness has changed over the past year and a half. See, I used to eat whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted. I’ve always had a decent metabolism, so this seemed like a brilliant, not at all unhealthy, idea.
I would proudly proclaim that carbs were my favourite food group. I threw that tid-bit into conversation like it was the most fascinating piece of information. Ever. (Okay, carbs may well still be my favourite food group – if there were no consequences I’d eat pasta all day every day – but I’ve taken on board that just because you love something, doesn’t mean it’s good for you). I would reject water (it’s SO boring!) in favour of fizzy drinks (with lunch and dinner, thanks). I kept chocolate bars in my desk drawer at work. Literally, an endless supply of chocolate (I need a sugar hit to concentrate!). I put 4 sugars in my cup of tea. FOUR. Could I even taste the flavour of the tea? Not really.
As I said, I’ve changed. I’ve become aware of how shitty my eating habits used to be. I actually care about goes into my body now. The number on the scales hasn’t changed, but I’m much more healthy. I’ve toned. It’s been a nice, rewarding experience.
Except for bread.
Granted I switched from white to multigrain, I can still end up devouring 6-8 pieces a day. That’s a lot for someone of my stature. So, I decided to actively try to cut back. The only problem: I live at home, both my parents work part time and they have a habit of buying freshly baked, straight from the oven, light, soft, delicious, fluffy, white bread for lunch ALL THE TIME. And then, they tell me about it. “Honey, there’s fresh bread in the kitchen – do you want some?”. NO, I shout back, determined to be good. Then I walk into the kitchen. The bread is just sitting there, mocking me. And I give in. Every time.
Except today. Today – I was prepared. I bought Vita Weat slices on my way home from the gym. I had a bread alternative. I was going to be good today! I opened the pack, pulled out 2 slices, added avocado and tomato and ham. It was working, they were delicious…for a snack. Do you know how unfilling Vita Weat slices are? I ate another 2 of the fuckers. I was still hungry. Maybe it was just taking some time for my stomach to communicate with my brain and say, “hey, I’m full now, all good, you can stop thinking about food”. Nope. The message never got delivered. I’m still hungry. It’s been 2 hours since lunch. I am going to eat bread.
Now, this may seem like giving in, and that’s exactly what it is. But it’s not giving up. Out of all the crap I used to put in my body, if the worst I do now is one too many slices of multigrain bread, that’s not too bad. I’ve come a long way. I’m 100 times healthier than I used to be. I’m allowing myself this one vice. Oh, beautiful carb slice, one day apart is one day too many – let’s never part again.