It’s no secret that the qualities you value in a friend change as you get older. Everyone gets busier and there is less time for people who don’t genuinely value, appreciate, support and care about you.
And so, this is just a little thank you to the friends in my life who care about me, through the good times and the not so good times. The ones who show they are there for me, even if it’s through something as simple as a text, because it is absolutely the thought that counts and often the simple things that mean the most.
It’s one thing to celebrate successes with someone but totally different to be supportive during sad times. It’s the people who are there for both, that are the most special.
To these friends I want to say thank you – I do not take you for granted, I appreciate you. I appreciate your friendship. You are incredible human beings!
Today I’m driving my bestfriend to the airport and out of my everyday life. I can’t begin to imagine how I’m meant to get through life without her. She has been one of the very few constant things keeping me sane & incredibly happy over the last 10 years. To wake up tomorrow knowing her beautiful face isn’t just around the corner is going to be a harsh reality. I’ve never particularly felt like I’ve had my heart broken, but at the moment I feel like I’ve lost part of it. Of course she will always be there, a phone call away, as that is what true friendship is. But it still feels like I’m losing a limb. The great thing about a true bestfriend, someone you love unconditionally, is that their happiness is often key to your happiness. With that in mind, I couldn’t be happier that she is moving away to look after herself and put her happiness first. I hope more than anything in the entire world that she finds it. Because if her world is happy, my world is happy. And then our worlds are one step closer together. Distance is nothing in the face of true love. And while I don’t believe in soulmates, if I had to choose one, I’d choose her.
There are some people you meet in life who are different from the rest, they are special, worth holding on to. We pluck them out of the 7 billion other people on the planet and call them friends. Some are better than others, some are the best. If you are true friends, then one of the most important things to you becomes their happiness.
That’s not to say it won’t absolutely suck if their happiness involves moving away from you.
I’ve recently had a friend move to the other side of the country. Another one, who has been the best friend for over 10 years, is mere months from moving to the other side of the world. I am incredibly proud and happy for them to be taking control of their lives, not worrying what anyone else thinks but doing exactly what they want and putting their happiness first. That said, I’d also like to take a moment to be selfish because, for me, it also absolutely sucks. I am losing two of the best girls I know from my everyday life. While it’s easier than ever to keep in touch across countries these days, there is only so far a message, skype or phone call can go before you realise that nothing can replace a real life hug, chats over dinner or girls night antics.
There are some people you meet in life who you know are going to stay in it, regardless of distance or timezone. They say real friendships aren’t about seeing each other every day, but not seeing each other and nothing changes. I am going to miss these girls so much it’s going to hurt. When I stop and think about it, I’m not sure how I’m going to live without them. But I know, no matter where we are, they will always mean just as much to me, we will always have this friendship and their happiness will always be one of the most important things to me. I love them both, and love knows no boundaries.
There has been a certain mentality among straight males that ‘men should be men’ – strong, tough on the outside, not showing too much sensitivity or feelings, especially towards their male friends. However, with the introduction of the term ‘bromance’ into our everyday vocabularies, this mentality is losing its dominance.
Bromance, a term coined in the 1990’s by Dave Carrie, the editor of a skateboard magazine titled Big Brother has become an increasingly popular term to describe the close friendship between two males. This friendship is a non sexual one, however you’ll find a lot of those who identify their relationship as a bromance will happily joke about it in a sexual manner. This isn’t to say there are any underlying sexual feelings (though sometimes you have to wonder), it simply means these boys are comfortable enough with their friendship to make such jokes.
Often, those in a bromance will also be in a heterosexual relationship, getting the best of both worlds as a bromance has been described as ‘a deep bond between two males that no woman could satisfy’. Of course, this begs the question, what if you are the woman who can’t satisfy your man the way his bro can? You might be in fear of getting left out, or left behind, if he can find the companionship often sought after in a relationship with his bro instead. Alas, the bromance isn’t something to fear. Quite the opposite, actually. A man who is open to the idea of bromance is likely to be more in tune with his emotions, or at least willing to talk about them. It also means he values his relationships, both platonic and romantic, and will happily dedicate time and effort to them.
I’ve been told that a bromance shows that love can happen for anyone, in any form of relationship. I’ve also been told that they aren’t for the faint of heart, as with them comes blood, tears, and of course some kicking in the nuts (typical responses from males who identify themselves as being in a ‘bromance’). Whatever you chose to believe, the bromance has made its mark on society. No longer are females the only ones declaring love for their best friends and greeting them with a hug. The boys are here, they’re proud to say they love their bro, they want the world to know it. And I would say the best way I could sum it up is with the below;