Anyone who knows me, knows I am notorious for crying over any and every thing. In this way I am similar to a baby who hasn’t learnt to talk yet and can only communicate through tears and sobs. Sad, stressed, angry, confused, happy, thankful, tired, hungry – no matter the reason, crying is my outlet. This is in fairly stark comparison to the fact that I’m actually a rather rational and logical person. I tend to think with my head rather than getting caught up in my emotions. The crying thing is just something I’ve never been able to control. Go figure.
So today is my birthday and I had told myself I wouldn’t cry. Unfortunately for my tear ducts, I forgot about birthday cards. There is nothing I love more than a thoughtful birthday card or message from loved ones. The problem is I have all these amazingly fantastic people in my life who seem to feel the same way about me, because they write these really lovely birthday cards. Which makes me really happy and thankful and, of course, cry.
But hey, if the only thing making me teary eyed today is reflecting on how great the people in my life are, and how great my life is in general, I’d say it’s a pretty good day!
Over the last couple of days I’ve been a mixture of emotions, from lacklustre to doubtful, sad to lonely. Today, I am happy. Not just content but really, truly happy. I can’t ascertain exactly what changed as I woke up with everything exactly the same as it was yesterday – I have the same issues, the same concerns, just a different feeling.
It isn’t hard for my mood to change multiple times throughout one day, not necessarily because of anything that’s happened but because of how I choose to look at it. Outlook, perspective, point of view; these things can be the difference between a good and bad day. Some days are harder than others to put a positive spin on and everyone has days that are just plain shit. Days where you want to crawl back in to bed, pull the covers over your head and throw a giant self pity party until tomorrow arises. If it wasn’t for these days, we probably wouldn’t appreciate the good ones quite as much.
I wouldn’t appreciate how great I’ve felt all day if it weren’t coming off the back of feeling shitty. And while my circumstances haven’t changed, today I appreciate all the great I have in my life. The great people, no matter where they may be, the great health, the great opportunities, the great freedom. There is no reason I shouldn’t be beaming from ear to ear. Instead of focusing on the negatives, I am overwhelmed with the positives. I am all the upbeat, inspiring memes rolled into one. I am Chris Traeger from season 3 of Parks and Recreation. Today, I am happy.